Sunday, 16 November 2008

This is a rubber chicken, not a cyclist.

Lets all laugh at Michael Rasmussen, again.

The Court of Arbitration for Sport took five hours to decide on the case of the Chicken. Whilst their report will not be made public for a few weeks it is known is that it took 5 hours to make a decision.

I can exclusively reveal that those five hours consisted of:
Considering the merits of the case - 1 minute
Pissing themselves laughing at Rasmussen - 4 hours 59 minutes.

It's been a fun old week at CAS, not only did they have the Rasmussen case to keep them amused, but they had a submission from Riccardo Ricco to consider. Well I say consider, I mean look at, well I say look at, I mean laugh out of the building.
Because, it would appear, that Riccardo Ricco is innocent.

In addition to providing CAS with fresh comedy material, Ricco has been training. Apparently he has been training for 7 hours a day! What this training involves has not been made clear. Now I don't know much about being a hairdresser, but surely you don't need to train for 7 hours a day to do it, do you?

Vote for me I like cycling.

This time last year the Meadowbank stadium was due to be flattened as the local council pretty much said 'what do you want a velodrome for' and 'there's gonna be one in Glasgow in a few years time' and more than likely 'Chris Hoy who's he?'

Then it's all change as Sir Chris sweeps all before him and happens to mention that the demolishing of Meadowbank, with nothing to replace it is not a good idea.

After that it was only a matter of time before the council unclenched their buttocks, saw much loved votes disappearing down the drain and changed their minds.
As a result a new 200m track (covered) is being talked about, in fact two sites have been identified and I doubt it will be long before the first brick is laid. Nowadays you can get a basic 200m velodrome with changing rooms, toilets and a couple of offices for less than £1 million. Small change when compared to the average local council expenses bill.

So would there be a new track on the way if Chris hadn't won his three golds? What do you think?

Surprisingly ASO can't control the weather.

Lance and his personal valet come manservent, Johan Bruyneel are off to have a meeting with ASO. Why? I'm sure they have things to discuss, but why now and not when Lance was racing?

OK so Lance is worried that the French may attack him. But is getting a rabbit punch a la Merckx more likely now than it was 6 years ago?

I guess the meeting is to get some sort of reassurance from ASO about security. Which is as about as likely as asking Stefan Schumacher to start talking sense. Come on, traditionally the organisers of Le Tour are totally unable to control anything on the race. Riders, spectators, disruptions to the route, the weather, acts of God, ASO may believe they have full control over them all, but in reality they can just about control which shoes they wear each day.
I'm sure the the meeting will be warm and friendly, as friendly as any meeting could be where the two sides hate each other. But nothing will happen as a result other than a press statement about respect. My advice would be stay at home Lance, do something you'll enjoy, going will only rasie your blood presure. Save the money one air fare, have a coffee and go for a ride.

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