Monday, 16 March 2009

Daddy, why has that man got three legs?

He's back, well, not that he's ever been away, but anyway he's back.
You'll remember the Olympics? Back in the summer Big Dave Brailsford was forced to pay excess baggage as his riders shoveled medals into their kit bags like there was no tomorrow and everyone was happy. Well, not quite everyone, young Cav was a bit pissed off that his luggage weighed the same coming out as it did going in. So Cav went off and did what he does best. Oh sure there were 'interviews' and aticles saying 'never again', 'that's it with BC', of course as these articles appeard in print and on' le Web' we'll have no idea as to their authenticy, my guess is that it they went something like this:
'So, Mark, did you enjoy the Olympics?'
Result headlines reading 'Cav hates BC', 'Cav hates Wiggins', 'Cav to appear on Britain's got talent' etc, etc
So anyway, he back.

Hey Floyd, haven't seen you in a while, been on your holidays?

Someone else who's not making a come back is Floyd Landis. Haven't seen Floyd in the peloton for a while? Well don't worry, he's still been riding his bike, he's not done anything naughty or been banned or anything like that, well at least that's how he's spinning it. it. No mention of words like regret, sorry, error or mistake oh no. Floyd has taken the view that if he sticks his fingers in his ears and goes la, la, la for long enough the events of 2006 will just go away.

So, as he's never done anything wrong, it's good to see that Floyd has set his sights on a real comeback. Oh yes, you see Floyd is talking Tour, but not Cali, oh no, Floyd is talking Le Tour, the big one. You know, the one he may or may not have won at some time in the past, or maybe not, or maybe he did, la, la, la, la.

Floyd has seen his old team mate in action at California, he's had his old team mate stand between himself and the Hamilton Twins 'south of the border'. He's seen it up close and he want's some of 'that action'.
That Le organisers would allow someone who was kicked of the race whilst in yellow back to have another go is about as likely as finding a snowball in hell. That aside there would be the question of team's, I didn't exactly notice a long queue for his signature when he rolled back into the land of the living. LPR said 'non' and even, yes, even, Rock Racing avoided him, just how toxic is Floyd that a team that thrives on employing the unemployable turns him down.

But should he get a ride, then the 2010 Le Tour should be a cracker, with the emphasis on crack. Ricco has put July 2010 in his diary as well, it's a shame that neither Kohl or Schumacher will be eligible to ride. That would be one hell of a team eh?

Things I wish I'd known when I was younger. (with apologies to a certain reasonably well known publication, er, Practical Caravan, I think).

We asked a series of top cycling personalities what they wish they'd known when they were younger.

David Millar: 'Never keep used syringes on your book shelves'

Tyler Hamilton: 'Let people know about my twin sooner'

Pat McQuaid: 'Stay in Ireland and get a job at the local Post Office'

More fantasy at a later date.


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