Monday, 20 April 2009

Picking names out of the hat.

I've got a bone to pick with Lance Armstrong. I mean it's all well and good Lancey Boy making a comeback, but did anyone of us actually think it was going to start an avalanche of comebacks. The UCI should issue some sort of guidelines re comebacks, they really should. I mean coming back to promote your charity is one thing, but Jan Ullrich making a comeback for God sake!!!!!
But if I thought that was bad how about Dick Pound making one. Ye Gods, if there was one name I'd thought we'd seen the last of it was Dicky boy.

Now I don't know how much of Dicks latest pronouncement is formulated by his views on Lance (I don't even know what his views on Lance are) or by his dislike of Uncle Pat and the UCI (the latter I suspect). You see Dicky could always be relied on to take the opposite view to Uncle Pats. It was just the way of the world. Pat likes red wine, Dick like white wine, Pat likes blonds, Dick like brunettes, you get the idea. So when Uncle Pat stood up for Lance it was somewhat inevitable that Dicky should come out slagging off Lance. Mind you from Lancey boys perspective it could have been worse, if Uncle Pat had slagged him off there is every chance that Pound would now be chasing him round the streets of Texas attempting to kiss him, Lance, do you realise how close that was?

My problem is that I actually thought Lancey boy was in the wrong during 'Showergate', but now, following Pounds outburst I'm starting to change my mind.

Close, but no brown smokey thing.

Amstel has come and gone and a Lotto rider has finished 4th, by their current form this is a major achievement, so there was doubtlessly be a bottle or two of bubbly popped over the weekend.
Close but no cigar then. I'm now running a book based on a predicted number of Lotto wins for the year, it goes something like this: 'Will Lotto win more races than Crazy Frank actually finishes' So far it's 2 all with 6 months to go. I doubt that either will be in double fingers some October. What has happened at Lotto? Have the training plans been lost at pre season camp? Is there a secret beer sponsorship that requires the riders to get pissed each night? God alone knows, but one thing is for sure the magic has gone. Something is clearly not right, we'll wait until the Tour to get a real picture, but putting all you eggs in Cadel basket is heaping pressure on the fella that he could well do without. Still Cadel + pressure + molly the dog = high entertainment value, may be this was the plan after all, no results in spring probably keep them on the front pages almost as much a Boonie, but come July a couple of dog induced outbursts and there will be no other news story in Belgium, indeed around the cycling world.

May 9th - take the day off work.

The UCI have announced that May 9th will be the day. Oh yes, the day! What day's that then? Well, dear reader, the day or all days, the day that the names of the riders who have 'failed' the bio passport checks.
This is of course the first time an actual date has been given, previously Uncle Pat has said 'next month', 'next couple of weeks', 'next week', 'soon', 'never'. As I mentioned months ago the main stumbling block has been legal, or rather getting enough money in the piggy bank to pay the lawyers once the inevitable writs start flying. And fly they will, I have no doubt that the riders in question will both know that they are on 'the list' and have already contacted their lawyers in an effort to get their retaliation in first.

So expect lots of declarations of innocence, questioning of the UCI's process and procedure and shows of outrage. In other words don't expect the unexpected, it will be business as usual as riders huff and puff and Uncle Pat tries in vain to control the situation and it's inevitable fall out. As I can't afford a lawyer I'll make no predictions as to who will be getting named and who won't. Actually to be honest I have no idea, I'd be better off sticking 800 names in a hat and picking some at random (maybe that's the way the UCI will work it?).

Still, however it pans out, the days following May 9th will be entertaining indeed.


1 comment:

Veloted said...

May 9th eh - what a strange date to pick - do they know the names now? - I suspect so - Hmmm, let me think - is a major grand tour due to start on that date? ;-)