Meths - not recomended as a refuling option.

This week I did something I haven't done for almost 9 months, I bought a copy of Cycling Weekly. Ye Gods, as they say in the surprised and disappointed business. It's worse than I remember it. (But then so's the weather, the beer at the local pub and todays youth).

Perhaps the worst £2.50 I've spent since I bought that training programme off the tramp that lives behind the bins at Asda. Mind you the only problem with him was that his suggested mid race drink was meths, which is currently on the UCI banned list.
I stopped my subscription a couple of years ago and now pick up, maybe, a couple of issues a year. The reason for my sub cancellation was simple, I felt it was no longer relevant to me, as it had basically stopped covering bike racing in any sort of detail, or indeed in some cases, at all. So 300 years of loyal readership ended.

Leaving it on the top shelf!

Most of the racers I know stopped buying it years ago as well and now it would seem that their sales target are met by sportive riders and those new to cycling or who have a passing interest in the business of riding a bike. Which is fine, I don't have a problem with that, but what I don't get is why they can't cover both sides of the tracks? Still what do I know.
I know the winter was always a slack time at the world centre of cycling news, Croyden, but seriously, 4 pages of photos that some bloke took of his mates riding Sportives, for God sake.

One of the reasons I bought CW in the past was to keep up to date with all the top cycling news, which lets be honest it never really did in any depth, if you were a Brit and racing on the European mainland you could be forgotten as quickly as last years crash.
Nowadays I can get all I need from the web and in more detail as well. Open up my RSS feeder each morning and there are dozens of exciting and hilarious stories to chose from.

Still that's the moaning about a magazine I never buy over with for the next 12 months, by the way did I ever tell you how crap Shed Monthly has become over the last two years? And don't even get me started on Central Heated illustrated or Hinge Weekly..........

Talking of Crap.

Mr Sella has been handed a one year ban, for, wait for it, 'co-operating' over his drugs bust. This will doubtlessly enrage Ricco, Kohl and Schumacher, which, come on, is the reason he's been given a shorter ban than they have.

No doubt the UCI and WADA have got totally pissed off with the collective whinging and never ending statements of innocence that the three have come out with over the last few months. The UCI can't extend their bans, so the next best ting is to really piss them off, and giving a one year ban to Sella, who has remained silent throughout the whole process, is a good way of doing it.

Diary Date.
This week sees the supposed release of the names of the riders who have funny looking scores on the old blood passport.
I was going to list the current betting, but my lawyer has warned me against it. But if you have a few spare minutes before now and Friday you could keep yourself entertained by drawing up a list and seeing how accurate it is come D day.

Personally I can't wait, anything that beats a doper is a good laugh in my book, baseball bat, lead pipe, boxing glove, UCI blood passport, I'll support anything that names new figures of hate.

Whilst I can't predict the names, I can, amazingly, predict what they will say, they will of course be:
'Innocent'
'Victims'
'Wankers'
Depending on your view and whether or not you happen to be an CERA dealer.



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See you in court.

Stefan Schumacher to sue everyone on the planet.

Friday, it was cold, it was foggy, it wasn't a good day for playing out was it. Still my mood was lightened by the news that Stefan Schumacher was to sue everybody. I don't mean just the Docs who found his system dripping with magic juice. Oh no he's after everyone, the TdF, the French anti doping agencies and probably you and me for not believing him.

When a rider who was good, but not a world beater suddenly slaughters the worlds best TTers in two (count em) Tour de France TT's you have to raise an eyebrow. Well that's what we all thought didn't we, but apparently we were wrong. Just as with the Hamilton twins, just as with Ginger Floyd (what ever happened to his brother Pink?), it seems that he was right and the rest of the planet was wrong.
So sit back, put your feet up and enjoy, this is going to be a long one and should keep us entertained for the next couple of years. I don't expect it will develop the farcical extremes of the two mentioned above, but Stefan Schumacher has that manic glint in his eye, and that can only be a good sign.

This week has seen the annual CSC/Saxo/It-Factory survival camp take place. And this year they got to play with guns! Whether these will actually be used in a live combat situation, say if Astana start getting too big for their boots at Le Tour, or if Riis has really taken a strong anti-doping line and Kim Andersen is being used as a target is open to question, but as always good fun seems to have been had by all. The riders always speak highly of this team bonding exercise and it would appear it pays dividends during he road season. Maybe more teams should take a trip down toy soldier lane.
One team that seems to need no help in bonding is Rock Racing, the half way house for the rehabilitation of ex offenders.
Whilst I admire Michael Balls thirst for publicity and his charity work in giving ex dopers and riders past their sell by date a 2nd chance I was disappointed that he didn't sign Ginger Floyd. Still maybe he's keeping his powder dry, over the next few years there are going to be plenty of ex smack heads that will need rehabilitating back into the community, Stefan Schumacher, Kohl and their chums will be back in a couple of years, just as the Hamilton twins retire.

Meanwhile the UCI announce that there will be 18 Pro Tour teams registered for 09, but with 4 of those due to end sponsorship at the end of the upcoming season (Confidis, Milran, Lampre and AG2R). I wonder though how many will be there come 2010. Fuji-Servetto proves there are still companies willing to put money into the sport in a big way but I doubt if Milram will be here much longer. They have already talked about pulling out even before the seasons started, still nothing to do with Schumacher is it. Perhaps the riders and staff that lose their jobs could sue Steffan I'm sure he wouldn't mind, he seems to have some spare time on his hands.


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Bernhard Kohl - your spaceship has landed.

Under the cardboard box, down the dark alley, live the UCI.

So Alexander Vinokurov is starting a 'charm offensive'. Christ that's something I'd like to see, must be some offensive.
He's been on on the bike with Andrei Tchmil. Andri though is none to keen on a linkup with the Kasak smack head as his team is registered in Switzerland, apparently down the same dark alley as the UCI, so it might be a tad embarrassing.

But help is at hand, it looks like he's about to get his ban jacked up from one to two years, as it should have been in the first place, but then hey, you expect the UCI to abide by or even understand it's own rules? Have you learnt nothing?



Bernhard Kohl - your spaceship has landed.

Bernhard Kohl is in trouble again! It would seem his manager is suing him for damages, allegedly. So having been banned for two years by the Austrian anti doping agency, the Alien now has to go to France to go through the whole process again.
You'd have thought with all this going on Kohl would have been busy, well apparently he is. But not too busy to whinge to the press about his treatment. FFS,
"In my testimony, I didn't protect anyone who could receive a sports sanction," said the Alien, the implication is of course that he did protect people who could receive a non sports sanction.

It's the whinging that pisses me off. I kind of hope that when they catch some twat for doping that should be the last we hear of them until they either return after a ban or die, which ever is sooner. But sadly this isn't the case, look at Landis, look at the Hamilton twins, the rubber chicken, the list goes on an on and on and on... Maybe the UCI should introduce additional penalty time for whinging, maybe stick an extra 2 months on the ban for every instance of winging. At that rate we'd all be saying Tyler who? Floyd who? Oh happy day.

Full House, tickets available via touts only.

For those of us who are regular at Manchester Velodrome, as riders, coaches or spectators the sudden influx of fans is, well, somewhat surprising, not surprising as in yuck, but surprising as in where have you been!
This years world cup sold out with the kind of rapidity that you normally expect for a boy band reunion tour and the Revolution is going just as fast. Rev 21 was sold weeks before the event as has 22 and I expect 23 and 24 will go the same way.
So how's the track fairing in Europe? Well 6 days are booming as always in Belgium and Holland, brim full most nights in Italy and uneven in Germany. So maybe there's a lesson to be learned. Maybe in some countries filling a hall for 6 consecutive nights is a lot harder than it used to be. Maybe a shorter programme 4 nights, 3 nights is the way to go.

Whilst I love the 6 day scene I have never understood why they have to be 6 days, why not 7 or 5, or 4? After all how many days does the four days of Dunkirk last? Not four I can tell you.
Would a 3 day event revitalise the track scene in parts of Germany?
With new tracks starting to pop up not just in the UK, but across Europe maybe more Revolution style events is the way to go, each week across the continent Friday, Saturday and Sunday could be Revolution nights. New fans, less stress for the riders, more marketing opportunities? Why scrap a 6 day race because you can only fill seats for 3 or 4 days? Why not make it a 3 or 4 day race?



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